somethings.

Somethings I won't remember. 

Somethings I can't forget. 

You said you'd had love 

like this before, 

but I couldn't know what you meant.

I had never loved another 

like I loved you then -

and the parts of me I gave you 

those are yours to keep.

And the parts of you 

you left behind 

will they be enough to keep you missing me? 

They are the parts best forgotten, 

the things best left unsaid.

But my memory insists 

on wandering the passes of my heart 

and my mind runs away with you again.

Even if we've spoken 

all the words we ever had to share. 

Even if it meant nothing more to you, now 

or ever, I'd still remember your love 

for teaching me I’d find someone more, 

alive in the ways I'd still want you forever.

a Novel view.

I went back to the cafe

where I first thought I'd fallen

in love with

you.

A Novel view.

While the man I love today

is still

asleep in bed -

the one we tangled in

all those yesterdays ago.

I still

expect to see you

somehow, now.

Still

I miss you.

the roses.

I left the roses.
The ones he gave me,
the ones that outlived you,
in the vase
on the table.
I left the roses.
In their pink-orange hues,
in their sunset tribute,
in the vase
on the table.
I left the roses.
I watched them shrivel,
I watched them die,
in the ways
I could not watch you.
I left the roses
in the vase
on the table
For you my love,
For you.

still.

I looked away
and you were gone
but my fingers somehow
feel you there
-the nothingness.
And though my heart peers,
perched
on the sill,
foolish, silly, still
it wills (it hopes!)
you into creation.
It wills (it hopes!)
that the shadow needs of
my desire conjure your figure,
loving living mire,
so I can see you just once more my dear.
Just once more
Just once more
Just once more
from this window, here.

red apple.

when I take a bite

I move through red

to white.

and when my lips fall back,

you'll see

from the inside out

this time.